It really doesn’t matter

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I’ve read a few articles and have seen advice given to lot’s of people in my situation ‘it really doesn’t matter! It’ll happen when you’re ready/least expect it/stop thinking about it! Besides you can be happy single!’, okay I get that they are just trying to make people feel better (trust me 100% I get that) but discounting those people who don’t want a relationship (that’s their choice, all the power to them!), I feel this is a bit dismissive. I think it does matter that we are missing out, after all about 95% of the population over 25 are coupled up/have children/or both-I feel that we are missing a pretty huge chunk of the human experience. Of life. Sure these relationships may not last, but still the experience is had. I also understand where people are coming from with the whole ‘virginity is no big deal’ thing, it’s not like we have a dot on our forehead that changes colour after we loose it and it really doesn’t affect our life in a physical way-but it does matter. Why? Well I think having a first relationship becomes even harder when you are a virgin as well. Not only are you nervous about a whole host of usual normal things you also have the v-card hanging over your head. Do you admit to it? How do you explain? Will they be able to tell? So as much as virginity in and of itself isn’t important it’s important in the context of trying to form a relationship. Well that’s my take anyway.

 

Vanessa

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One thought on “It really doesn’t matter

  1. my sister is 27 and is not a virgin . she’s with her first but he wasn’t her only I’m def the only virgin in my group of friends.. though I have a small group of female friends they’ve gone around and are going around a few or more times and I hear the same thing.. sometimes they say they wish they waited but prob not as long as I have haha. statistics aside I’ll say this . I think we over complicate the entire thing. I realize that we hold more power that we think . i mean yea I’m still a virgin but idk I see you’re traveling now so maybe you’ll get that moment where things finally make sense for you but I just came from a mini vacation myself and Lately i’ve realized that we all have our own story you know? so besides the damn enjoy being single route which clearly come from single non virgins. but when it comes to the conversation with the guy I promise there is a moment where it will just come and if it’s any guy that you want to be to be your first it wont be the conversation you have in day three . it’s going to be the guy you spend months getting to know , the guy that makes you smile because he notices the little things the guy you allow to see you at your most vulnerable moments. haha at this point as long as we’ve waited we wont give it to just anyone.. and in one of your many deep talks he’s gonna know because you’ll tell him. it wont happen when IT actually happens. lol

    You admit it when the time is right.
    You explain it by telling your story
    and they can’t tell. No one can ever tell . sadly our breed are considered people with no sense of adventure who talk to no one in the day .. and read harry potter and twilight over and over again.. wait that part is true for me actually .. any way

    It’s gonna be okay promise lol .

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